business leaders

The Three Words That Changed My Son’s Life

I’d like to introduce you to my 3 year old.  He is pure joy in a little body.  He is also the Walker Family wild child.  He is very high energy and has been since birth.  When I was pregnant with him, I felt like he was trying to kick his way out.  Until, of course, it was time to come out and then he tried to climb his way back up and refused to come out.  He was our first to crawl, walk and talk.  He can create pure chaos in a matter of seconds and when he was about 15 months he was getting into a lot of trouble.  He would hit, kick and bite his brothers.  He was destroying our house and making messes at lightning speed. He may have thought his name was “No” because that is what he heard all the time.  He received a lot of negative feedback and didn’t seem to mind at all.  As his mother, I was worried.

One night in great frustration, I had to put him to bed.  Here is this little angel face with demonic actions staring up at me and I knew I had to do something different.  He was squirming and going crazy and I asked him softly, “Who loves you?”  He looked at me with his big eyes, smiled and said, “Mommy wubs me!.”

That was the beginning of change in our home.  I asked him this question every night before bed, “Who loves you?”  He always started with Mommy, and then I would ask, who else?…  and who else?…  until we had come up with a good list.  Behavior started to change.  We were able to transition from hitting people to hitting the couch and then the hitting slowed down.  It still hasn’t stopped.

Now he is helpful, happy, and a little less destructive.  We still keep a close eye on him.  Some may say that is the result of him getting older.  That is part of it of course.  But the real reason my son is soooo much happier and easier to deal with is because he KNOWS he is loved.   When someone knows how much you love them, they want to make you happy.  They want to perform well.

If you are struggling with a team member or difficult client, instead of going in and addressing their behavior and performance first, consider taking a side door.  Consider increasing the love and decreasing the judgment.  Consider putting your frustration aside in order to do what is best for them.  And consider that once they feel truly loved, a lot of the challenges you are currently having with them will adjust without you having to fix anything.

Leadership is a key part of success in business.  And being a great leader starts with love and service. For more details: business strategy you can also visit here: time management