Money Doesn’t Buy You Happiness, How You Spend It Does
Ahhh the ever waging battle between scarcity and abundance mindset. I don’t know exactly where I developed my scarcity mindset, but by the time I was in my mid 20’s, I was living and breathing scarcity. I couldn’t pay my bills. No matter the size of my commission check, it never seemed to be enough. We couldn’t seem to get ahead. I never had enough time and I needed more time to earn more money. Poor people were humble and righteous. I couldn’t ask for sales because then I felt like I was taking from people who probably didn’t have it anyway. Sound like a hot mess? It was!
Then I was introduced to abundance thinking. It was brand new to me. Like learning a foreign language. Now I am supposed to tell myself that money flows easily and naturally to me. I am no longer supposed to say, “I can’t afford that.” Instead I am supposed to say, “I am choosing not to purchase this right now.” They felt surprisingly the same to me. Either way there was still not enough in my bank account to buy whatever the item was. I remember having this thought one day that I wanted to say yes or no to the things my children requested of me based on what was best for them NOT on what we could afford. It seemed like such a novel idea. It was definitely not how I grew up.
The idea of abundance mindset really resonated with me. It was exciting and I felt hope for the first time in a LONG time. But it didn’t seem to be translating into my reality. It honestly took me a few years of playing around with abundance mindset until it really started to click for me.
Here’s what I wish I had known:
It’s not how much you make that matters
I remember feeling like if I could only make ___________, then things would be good. I would focus on that number, but instead of it creating a feeling of prosperity, it created a feeling of deficit. I only noticed the difference between that number and what I really had. I still remember the first month I made $14,000 I felt stressed, scared, and like there wasn’t enough. My highest paycheck ever led me to one of my biggest “Scarcity attacks” ever. You see it REALLY isn’t about how much is on that paycheck. It has so much more to do with how you feel about that number, and what you do with those funds.
How you spend your money does matter!
Abundance is not about if you save or if you spend. It is about HOW you spend and HOW you save. If you are blowing through money spending on things that are not going to bring you lasting happiness, you are not living in abundance. If you are saving money and swimming in your pool of money like Scrooge MacDuck, you are also not living in abundance. Before I spend on any purchase I ask myself a few questions:
- Do I need this?
- Will this purchase/investment make me more money?
- Will this purchase/investment increase my happiness for an extended period of time?
- Will this purchase/investment make someone else happy for an extended period of time?
- Does this purchase/investment continue to produce past the life of the product?
The more of those that I can answer yes to, the more happy I am to spend my money on it. I can’t stand wasting money. It is repulsive to me. I also don’t like watching other people waste their money.
I do spend money on things that I don’t need. For example, I love making homemade wheat bread for my family. But, as a busy business owner, I don’t really have time to do it. When I invested in my Bosch mixer and wheat grinder, I didn’t NEED either of those things. But it does increase my happiness, and the happiness of my family. And I really hope that the memories my kids have of mom’s bread, and mom’s commitment to healthy eating outlast the life of my Bosch mixer.
I bought a beautiful rug for my living room. I did need a rug, but I am sure I could have bought one less expensive. It wasn’t going to make me money, but I knew it would make me happy every time I saw it. It is perfectly me and my style. Creating a beautiful home is something that I believe increases my family’s happiness and I do hope that the memories we create in that room by far outlast the rug.
But there are a lot of things that I choose not to spend on. We have 1 TV in our house. We have mismatched dishes and silverware. We have functional but not fancy cars. Our dog is not a pure breed, he was a free rescue dog. I buy just about every item of clothes my family owns on clearance. I buy good quality shoes that I love, on clearance, and wear them until they are worn out. Then I replace them. I think I have 4 pairs of shoes right now. I own very few movies, CD’s and video games. I don’t spend a lot on eating out each month.
I am not suggesting that how I spend is good and how someone else spends is wrong. The key to my spending is that it is right for ME! I think about what I spend. I consider every dollar coming my way as a blessing. And I am thoughtful about how to use that blessing. And quite often I choose not to spend on things because I want to invest in people.
I invite you to evaluate how you are spending right now. Are you setting yourself up for abundance or for scarcity through how you spend? To get more details: business strategies we also invite to you browse: sales skills
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